Mikes promise of “I’ll never drink again” lasted a whole month and a half. So, in the end, my trying to give him a second chance lasted a whole month and a half. I told him his second chance - our being together - wasn’t working for me and to come get what little he had at my apartment about two weeks ago.

Since then its been slowly sinking in — the finality.

We both agree that we probably should have just left it alone (trying to make it work) when I first moved in with my sister back in July. We’re on fair terms I suppose. Hes moving out of town, in with a friend of his, in about a month. We’re moving on and away from our life we tried to make together…for the past 6 years.

Its just bewildering. I have no regrets. Lots of questions - but no regrets. It was a good time spent with him…and I hope he feels the same way regarding the time he spent with me.

Its hardest at night. Laying, reality creeps in, and I begin realizing … knowing that this is it. Me and my apartment with my cat. Its not how I wanted it.

I miss him. But hes not coming back. ‘Just a couple beers’ means that much to him.

Okay. I can live with that. Its only just really fucking hard at the moment.

Hope Sent,
~ Ani